Six Ways to Make People Like You

How to Win Friends and Influence People 

By: Dale Carnegie

Rule 1: Become genuinely interested in other people.

1. "Do this and you will be welcome anywhere."

2. "You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you." 

3. "Ask questions to other people, questions that they would enjoy answering." 

What this rule means is that, not only talk about yourself when there are a bunch of people around. Ask questions about them just not about yourself. Encourage them to talk about themselves. If you encourage them to talk about themselves then you will learn something new about them. If you only talk about yourself then your friends might get bored and just won't want to be around you. Make people welcome and ask questions and they will feel that you truly want to be their friend. Not knowing something or anything about you "friend" doesn't make you guys friends. It doesn't make you guys friends because friends know things about each other. How I will apply this rule to myself is, I mean I think I already apply to this rule. I already apply to this rule because every time I meet someone new I ask them questions about themselves. After I ask them questions I tell them a little bit about myself. 

"If you want others to like you and develop real friendships keep this in mind become genuinely interested in other people!"

-Unknown  

Rule 2: Smile 
1. "Actions speak louder than words, and a smile says, "I like you. You make me happy. I am glad to see you." 
2. "You don't feel like smiling? Then force yourself to smile." 
3. "It creates happiness in the home, fosters good will in a business, and is the countersign (witness or indication) of friends." 

Rule number two means to always have a smile in your face. Smiles could mean a lot to a person. When you smile to someone they usually smile back. Usually the rude people don't smile back and sometimes that is the reason why some people don't like them. For example, when people smile at me I usually smile back even if I am having a bad day. Having a smile on your face everyday can say a lot about you. Smiles tell either if you are mean or nice sometimes. Sometimes when you think that a person is mean and rude just because they didn't smile back and it turns out to be the opposite. Sometimes people don't have a reason to smile or they are just having a bad day. Smiles are warm and people enjoy them. In some occasions other smiles make others smiles as well. When babies laugh and smile it obviously makes you smile because they are just so cute and adorable. Always remember to smile even if you are having a bad day. Smiles make other people smile and when they see you frown they don't smile. Keep in mind that smiles is a daily routine.

"Use your smile to change the world, don't let the world change your smile." 
-Anonymous 



Rule 3: Remember names 
1. "A man's name is to him the sweetest and most important sound in any language." 
2. "If you don't remember names, you are headed for trouble." 

What this rule is trying to say is that, remembering names is really important. Remembering names is really important because when you want to refer to a person you will call them by their name. Sometimes when people see that you don't remember their name they get offended. They get offended because they remember your name and you don't remember theirs. In some cases people don't get offended because they understand that you guys barely met and sometimes its hard to remember names and especially names that you haven't heard before. In addition sometimes people don't care what you call them as long as they have a name. People even tell you sometimes to call them a specific name or call them what you want to call the, in general what you find easy to remember. But you need to try your best to remember names because that is the most important thing to a person and that is how you make friends.

"Remember my name, remember my face, 'cause there ain't no other honey, that can take my place." 
-Roxy Quiksilver 



Rule 4: Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves. 
1. "If you aspire to be a good conversationalist, be an attentive listener."
2. "Remember that the man that you are talking to is a hundred times more interested in himself and his wants and his problems than he is in you and your problems." 

Rule number four may mean that, you could ask questions to the people you meet so they could say that you actually want to be friends with them and you want to get to know them. People usually love to talk about themselves when it comes to giving out information. For example, at school when it's your first day of school they ask you to share something interesting about you or something you want people to know about you. People don't usually talk about their problems or anything like that and if they do and they barely know you then they already trust you enough to let you know their problems. I will use this myself. I mean I already use it. When I meet someone new I usually talk about them not me and if they ask me about then I answer their questions. But I usually tell them to tell me about themselves. Sometimes people don't know what to say. When people don't know what to say it's because thy are shy or they believe that they don't have nothing interesting to say.

"Most of the successful people I've known are the ones that do more listening than talking." 
- Bernard Baruch 



Rule 5: Talk in terms of the other man's interest. 
"The royal road to a man's heart is to talk to him about the things he treasures most." 

This rule means that, ask about the things that he likes to do. Or ask about what they care about the most. People love talking about what they love or like. It makes people happy when they talk about the things that make them happy which are the things they like. When people ask questions they are usually about the things they like because no one wants to hear the negative things about a person. Everything should be positive because positive vibes makes life better. For example when people want to get to know me I tell them the positive things not the negative things. If you talk about the negative things they won't know what to say or they will feel bad. I use this in my daily life because when I meet someone I ask about positive things not negative because then I feel bad or I don't know what to say. Positive vibes have to be around all the time because there is no time for negative ones.

"The true secret of happiness lies in taking a genuine interest in all the details of daily life." 
-William Morris 



Rule 6: Make the other people feel important--and do it sincerely. 
"The desire to be important is the deepest urge in human nature." (John Dewey)"Helping people feel important and appreciated works magic." 

The last rule of "ways to make people like you" means that, make people feel important which is don't say something negative that you know it's going to make them feel worthless or put them down. Every person out there should feel important. Everyone should feel important because everyone cares for each other. No one should ever feel unimportant because everyone cares but in their own ways. For example, when people give you lessons but scream at you and you feel unimportant it's not in that way because they are just doing that so you won't get hurt or anything like that. How I use this in my daily life is I tell people how I feel about them. Another way is that when I see them down I try to tell them cute things so they feel important because there is people who really do care a lot and have a big heart. Having a big heart makes people feel important. Never make people feel like they aren't important because you never know how they will feel or what their actions will be.